This worksheet is to help you practically determine exactly where you are successful as companions and where you are in need of change. After reading each question listed, rate yourself from 1-10 (10 meaning very satisfied, 1 meaning very dissatisfied). Husbands should use the left side of the paper and wives the right side to record your answers. Both husband and wife should each have their own copy to work on. When you have completed the questions, compare your answers with your spouse and discuss solutions.
1. Choices to be a spiritual companion
- Do you pray with your spouse about the personal issues in your life?
- Do you pray with your spouse about your marriage on a regular basis?
- Do you go to church and sit with one another on a weekly basis?
- Do you talk about the things you have learned from the sermon later that day?
- Do you talk over the things you are learning in your personal reading of Scripture, or from a Christian book you are interested in?
- Do you serve others together? As Sunday School teachers? Giving of your time to help others in practical ways?
2. Choices to be an intellectual companion
- Do you talk over the things that your spouse is interested in?
- Do you listen and engage with your mate about their interests?
- Can you learn from your spouse when they are explaining their interests with you?
3. Choices to be an emotional companion
- Do you support and encourage your mate when he or she has been hurt by someone?
- Can your mate sense when you are depressed, and is there an attempt to lift you up?
- Is your spouse emotionally present and caring in your relationship?
- Does your mate verbalize their love to you regularly?
- Do you share your deepest emotions with one another?
- Do you give and receive emotional support?
- Do you have the freedom to laugh and cry with one another?
- Do you accept your emotional differences?
4. Choices to be a communicative companion
- Do you talk over your day with one another when you come together in the evening?
- Do you freely share your opinions and ideas with your spouse?
- Do you regularly give encouragement and can you also receive it from your spouse?
- Do you plan future actions and make decisions together?
- Do you share your hopes, fears, hurts, and goals with one another?
- Do you write cards or love notes to one another?
5. Choices to be a recreational companion
- Do you have any mutual recreation that you do together?
- Do you enjoy walking, biking, or going to the gym together?
- Do you have time set aside just for recreation with your spouse?
- Do you go shopping together and enjoy just being together?
- Do you have a weekly date night?
- Do you do chores around the house together?
6. Choices to be a parental companion
- Do you feel like you are on a parental team with your spouse?
- Do you split up the parental duties with your mate?
- Do you feel you are in full agreement with your mate over discipline of the children?
- Do you believe you and your spouse are both engaged in teaching your children spiritual truth?
7. Choices to be a physical and sexual companion
- Do you give thoughtful gifts periodically to your spouse just to say “I love you?”
- Do you take thoughtful actions just to say “I love you?”
- Do you serve your mate when your help is requested?
- Do you in a non-sexual way touch and hold one another on a daily basis?
- Do you approach each other regularly for sexual relations, and are your advances received favorably?
- Do you express real affection while engaged in sexual relations, or is it just a physical act with little emotion?